Alzheimer's Patients

Alzheimer’s Patients

By Judy Bechtle

In today’s world we are seeing more and more people developing this terrible disease. The roads that are being claimed to lead into this disease are many. Some I question. But I am not a medical doctor and never have claimed to be something I am not. I am a writer with first hand knowledge of this disgusting disease. No, I don’t have it, but my husband of forty-four years does have it.

We have gone through the treatments that made him sicker than sick. Yes, that can happen – we have seen him so sick not even the doctors understand why he is still alive.

When a person develops this disease at first they don’t want it told to the world. They have heard the horrors of what they will look like and what will become of them. They have heard the rumors and most likely read the articles published about what they will go through in the days ahead.

For our family we have protected my husband. We never have current pictures of him for him to see. We have the house displayed with pictures of how he was when he was healthy and smiling. We show pictures of him with the blue twinkle in his eyes and his bright smile. I guarantee he doesn’t look like that now. I, nor any of his family, would ever insult him, or degrade him, by allowing his present day appearance to appear in public. You might think this is all for the family. It isn’t. It’s all for his currant mental health.

An Alzheimer’s patient needs to feel they are the same person and not some decrepit excuse of what they once were. We would never exploit his illness and how it changed his appearance for a pat on the back that it happened to someone we know. I don’t understand people that do this sort of publishing of this disease. It is WRONG to degrade a person for self acknowledgement in the name of medical science or caring.

Persons of this terrible disease NEED to believe with all they have that they are still the same person as they once were, but now have restrictions. They need to go out in public on good days. We have good and bad days with my husband. On good days visitors are allowed, we go out in public. On bad days – don’t waste the gas – we won’t allow you in the house. We won’t allow anyone to go away and report on how “bad” he looks.

That is just on appearances, and then there are other factors. A person with Alzheimer’s disease walks differently and forgets often. It is not nice to parade these patients around in public or promote their lack of abilities to the world. Leave these once productive and beautiful people some dignity! They embarrass easily and understand when they call something different than it is. They still have feelings. They can and will become withdrawn – and this is the very worse thing that can be allowed to happen. They need to know they are still part of the family. We often ask my husband’s advice and listen to his opinion on things. We often give him certain things to fix because he used to be our fixer.

Is living with an Alzheimer person easy? Hell no. Ask my family. You can’t imagine how many times we have dried tears that he never saw. It is harder than living with a cancer or any other disease ridden patient with a day to day expectancy. It is heart breaking to see what was once a vibrant, intelligent person becomes what will of them. But it is just as heart breaking to see their pictures plastered on the Internet so someone can get a pat on the back as a caring person. Alzheimer’s is a disease that doesn’t take a person’s life it slowly steals it along with any dignity they can hold on to. The body shuts down over time until vital organs no longer understand how to work. And then they pass over. So please don’t rob these victims of any remaining self respect they have in the name of “doing moral goodness.” This is one time a picture is not worth a thousand words. It is pure and simple selfishness meanness on the part of the person exploiting the victim. Would you want YOUR Alzheimer’s face plastered on the Internet? I wouldn’t and we refuse to allow one of our family members to be insulted or ridiculed like that. If you truly care - then spend time with them talking of the past and how much fun she had. Laugh at their forgetfulness. Ask to borrow his Alzheimer before answering the phone or going to a meeting, but laugh. Make them laugh. DO NOT make them feel embarrassed or a freak of nature.

If you want to help fight this disease then donate time and money to research a cure. Get a job in the medical profession as we all are in order to help any way we can. This disease affects other parts of the body and can be filed under Alzheimer. You are helping by just volunteering on blood drives or in hospitals where ever they need help.